I turned 40 yesterday. It’s a completely weird idea. I’m so not even close to where I thought I’d be. As a teen I was always dreaming big. Scientist. Author. Even President. (Because I like telling people what to do. What can I say? It’s the big sister in me.) At any rate I was someone successful. Accomplished.

What have I accomplished since being a dreamer in high school? Just about every job I’ve had I’ve worked my way up to a supervisory position. From seasonal help to store supervisor. Temp worker to forecast analyst for service parts of a multi-million dollar lawn and garden manufacturer. But now? I’m a mom. Of two boys. I always thought I’d have a daughter. But I have boys. And I don’t think we’ll be having any more. Who wants to have a baby at forty? Sounds exhausting. Looking back, it seems like my whole life was preparation for being the Mom of boys. Always surrounded by boys, whether relatives or friends in college. And cleaning animal skulls as a job completely out grosses anything they can think of. I hope.

I teach scrapbooking and stamping, and sell supplies thru The Angel Company. I could even be considered passionate about it. But I’m not going to force people to tell their stories. I just try to explain that everyone has stories their family will want to remember, and scrapbooking is how you pass them on. Everyone has their own version of events, and scrapbooking is how you get to tell your side of the story.

I guess I should have taken more art classes. I never thought I’d be earning money in any art related field. But I’ve always been crafty, so I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised.

I have gained 50 pounds since college. It’s horrible. I’m surprised everytime I look in the mirror, because the outside so does not reflect how I feel about myself. Two years ago, I did manage to lose 20 pounds, and kept 15 off for a year, but the stess of the past year just undid all that work. But I have to lose the weight. My cholesterol count is way too high, and it just keeps getting worse. If I want to avoid pills for as long as possible, I need to loose weight. So. I’m dieting again this winter, and this time I’m going to keep going till I’m where I need to be for health’s sake. And yes, I know I need to exercise too, but exercise alone will not help me loose the weight. It can help me loose 5 pounds here or there, or help me maintain weight, but in general it won’t help me loose 50 pounds.

So here’s my public announcement. Because I’m great at making big plans, but terrible at follow thru. You guys are my weight loss assistants. Feel free to ask for updates, but please don’t nag. Nagging makes me feel contrary. Just ask Jess.